just open your fucking mouth ;p
The young Grandson looks over at his 18 year old newlywed wife and asks her, “Will you pass the honey, honey?” She giggles and passes the honey.
His father, not to be outdone, looks over to his beautiful wife and asks, “Will you pass the sugar, sugar?” She laughs, “Your still a charmer,” and passes the sugar.
The Grandfather looks up, makes eye contact with his wife of 55 years and asks, “Will you pass the tea… bag?”
I heard it as…
An Englishman, Irish man & a Scotsman are at a restaurant with their prospective partners. The Irish man is on a first date & not sure what to say so is looking round for inspiration when he heard the Englishman say “pass me the honey, honey”. Thinking oh that’s good he hears the Scotsmen ask his Gf “to pass him the sugar, sugar”. Thinking he’s got this he turns to his new Gf & says “pass me the milk ya cow”.
“Ey could you pass us the milk, ya fockin cow?”
Pass the pork…pig.
As much I as enjoy this subreddit, I constantly fail to translate any of the good jokes to my own language. Still enjoy reading them, though 🙂
Oh man I shouldn’t have taken a bong rip as I was reading the punchline.
Grandparents are the best; they know marriage like a book.
We had a big family thanksgiving dinner and I made a Freudian slip. What I meant to say was, “Mom, please pass the gravy.” But I actually said, “Shut-up, you ruined my life, you fucking bitch!”
Explain?
When is the funeral?
“Will you pass the bread…basket?” was the ending when I first heard it.
The grandfather looks up from his bowl of cornflakes and makes eye contact with his wife of 35 years and asks, “Will you pass the raisins, raisin?”
I’ve heard it as pass the bacon, pig
This is funny too
This happened to me IRL.
I was colleagues with a married couple. The husband was well known for his quick wit and biting sense of humor. They bought their lunch groceries for the week and kept them in the paper grocery bag in the lunchroom fridge.
One Friday in the lunchroom he finished making his lunch with the last of their groceries. The paper sack was worn and torn from a week of folding and unfolding. He turns to me with just the right comedic timing and said, “Do you want this, old bag?” Oof!
The next Sunday I went to dinner with family, and brought my leftover calamari for lunch. I asked, “Hey, do you want some of these, Squid Legs?”
I’m still pissed that he came up with his like nothing, and I had to stew about it the whole weekend to get him back. Hats off to you sir.
Explian
I heard it as pass me the bacon pig
I don’t know why I am cackling at 2 am like an idiot. Ami getting old, is this what we call boomer humour
Pass me the wine, you swine !!
Pass the vegetable, on nevermind you’re a vegetable
Reminds me of this 2 Ronnies sketch.
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0UDDCna_li8&ab_channel=HellblazerJC](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0UDDCna_li8&ab_channel=HellblazerJC)
If the grandmother 55 they likely all got married and got kids at around 18.
Problem : to complete the joke he’d have to say “…pass the tea bag, bag” but then you’d lose the nice touch of the reader connecting the final dots themselves.
Solution : The Grandfather picks up the kettle but as he turns to address to his wife of 55 years, she cuts him off with,
“Unless you want me to pour that boiling water down your pants, you’d better think *very carefully* about *exactly* how you’re gonna ask me to pass you this tea bag…”
​
*”beep-boop” I am the re-write bot!*
Dads everywhere are laughing at this.
>His father, not to be outdone, looks over to his beautiful wife and asks, “Will you pass the sugar, sugar?” She laughs, “**Your** still a charmer,” and passes the sugar.
You’re*
And that’s when grandpa got smacked into next month . . .
will you teabag, teabag?
I dont what it is but i think the word tea bag is sexual as well.
Shame on you
Pass the prunes, prune.
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