free joke here ;p

just open your fucking mouth ;p

Finally a smart blonde joke

A blonde walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the Loan officer. She says she’s going to Europe on business for two weeks and Needs to borrow $5,000.

The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for the loan, so the blonde hands over the keys to a new Mercedes Benz SL 500.

The car is parked on the street in front of the bank, she has the title and everything checks out. The bank agrees to accept the car collateral for the loan.

The bank’s president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the blond for using a $110,000 Benz as collateral against a $5,000 loan.

An employee of the bank then proceeds to drive the Benz into the bank’s underground garage and parks it there. Two weeks later, the blonde returns, repays the $5,000 and the interest, which comes to $15.41.

The loan officer says, “Miss, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire.

What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?”

The blonde replies, “Where else in New York City can I park my Car for two weeks for only $15.41 and expect it to be there when I return?”


41 responses to “Finally a smart blonde joke”

  1. lumpthefoff Avatar
    lumpthefoff

    I just had to read “walks into a bank” and knew it was the parking joke.

  2. heelspider Avatar
    heelspider

    Wait until this “smart blonde” realizes banks don’t actually take possession of collateral unless you default.

  3. opoqo Avatar
    opoqo

    So…the joke is a multimillionaire don’t have her own parking space in NYC?

  4. AddressPale4551 Avatar
    AddressPale4551

    I mean, she could park it at her house……which multimillionaire house doesn’t have its own parking….

  5. culb77 Avatar
    culb77

    What do you call a truly smart blonde?

    A golden retriever.

  6. keener91 Avatar
    keener91

    Last time I read this joke, it was an Indian.

  7. coyoteatemyhomework Avatar
    coyoteatemyhomework

    I heard this joke verbatim except it was a rich old lady (not a blonde.) The moral was dont underestimate old people.

  8. freecain Avatar
    freecain

    This joke always bothered me. The bank wouldn’t take the car, you would just sign the title over to the bank and you would keep the car. They would only repossess the car if you failed to pay the loan – at which point the car would be sold at auction. Legally the bank would need to pay you the value of the car minus the cost of repossession, auction fees and the outstanding balance on your loan including any fees – so not a real incentive to take an outsized collateral against a small loan. When asking for the loan, even one for 5k, the bank would also need to verify income, ownership of the car, and credit history BEFORE giving the loan – any one of which would have shown she was wealthy. After taking the car (assuming they did) it’s not like they would leave it in the *parking* lot of the *New York City* bank (how many of them have parking spaces?) – they would probably put it offsite somewhere. When she got back and asked for her car, odds are she would be asked to go pick it up from the location, at her cost. Lastly – it would be more than $15 – since there would be a loan origination fee – which is at least .5%, or $25, plus the interest rate.

  9. yoshimah Avatar
    yoshimah

    This joke came in with the dinosaurs

  10. henrycaul Avatar
    henrycaul

    Interest rates are pretty high right now, I think it would be more than $15.41

  11. frank_mania Avatar
    frank_mania

    I find it refreshing that there are people in this world who haven’t heard or read this joke before. It’s always new to someone. Sort a hope-springs-eternal vibe.

  12. NilByM0uth Avatar
    NilByM0uth

    A fiver says OP is blonde

  13. cruiserman_80 Avatar
    cruiserman_80

    The first time I heard this joke was about 40 years ago and it was a lad from the country and a pawnbroker who (unlike a bank) would hold your item as collataral. So this joke has actually gotten dumber over time.

  14. _MildlyMisanthropic Avatar
    _MildlyMisanthropic

    Is the real joke how you said “finally” in the title despite this joke being posted weekly for the last 5+ years?

  15. makenxie Avatar
    makenxie

    The names changed to protect the innocent.

  16. viper7747 Avatar
    viper7747

    Comes out to around 8% annualized interest. Probably higher these days, but at the usual rate of $75 a day in NYC, it’s still an unbelievable scam on the bank, even at 20% annual interest.

  17. OxotHuk0905 Avatar
    OxotHuk0905

    This is an old joke and im sure OP replaced Omar singh with blonde. Gheez

  18. chrispy137 Avatar
    chrispy137

    A nd all the cocaine to still be in the trunk.

  19. RollemFox Avatar
    RollemFox

    My blonde smarty wife laughed out loud.

  20. heyroons Avatar
    heyroons

    she can’t park it at her house?

  21. Jade-Balfour Avatar
    Jade-Balfour

    Heard this joke before, but I love it every time I hear it

  22. agpc Avatar
    agpc

    This joke is older than the universe

  23. mr-poopie-butth0le Avatar
    mr-poopie-butth0le

    Na, repurposed jokes aren’t any good

  24. Transki Avatar
    Transki

    They put 5090 miles on the car in 2 weeks.

  25. Bootlebat Avatar
    Bootlebat

    May sound dumb but I don’t get it.

  26. marckferrer Avatar
    marckferrer

    We have the same home here but it’s a turk instead of a blonde

  27. TooMuchFun007 Avatar
    TooMuchFun007

    Finally a blonde witch revealed herself.

  28. Daddio4u Avatar
    Daddio4u

    Brunette money backs the entire system ?

  29. ArcticFox2014 Avatar
    ArcticFox2014

    Where does the blonde usually park her car when she’s not going on vacation in Europe?

  30. 8abak Avatar
    8abak

    Only a blond multimillionaire can have no parking

  31. MackumTheKnife Avatar
    MackumTheKnife

    Plot change: she was really a brunette

  32. Ihavenoclueagain Avatar
    Ihavenoclueagain

    Brilliant!

  33. Indie_uk Avatar
    Indie_uk

    Yes, “finally”, 2003

  34. Ohgetserious Avatar
    Ohgetserious

    Oh I’ve got one. A priest, a rabbi and a minister walk into a bar seeking a $5000 loan so they can fly in a plane with two parachutes and a backpack…

  35. DragonSlayer6160 Avatar
    DragonSlayer6160

    Bravo!

  36. pcweber111 Avatar
    pcweber111

    Jesus laughed at this the first time it was told.

  37. Albertooz Avatar
    Albertooz

    Still a blonde joke, she revealed her plan next time no loan…

  38. Daddio4u Avatar
    Daddio4u

    Except no bank would take the responsibility

  39. jacoberu Avatar
    jacoberu

    recent repost! get some fresh rubber fish in here to smack me around! we need to limit reposts at the software level! can only duplicate in the same channel every so many months, etc: who’s with me?!

  40. freerangepops Avatar
    freerangepops

    This is an old and good joke. Looking to improve it by adding gender and hair color did nothing to improve it.

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