The man, named John, was looking for a way to add excitement to his relatively boring and routine life. He approached the man in the trench coat, who continued to stare directly forward.

John approached the man and said, “Hey man, what’s in the briefcase?”

The man looked at John and replied, “I cannot tell you. If you want to find out, you will have to see for yourself. Follow me.” The man turned around and walked into the alley at the side of the black building, his black shoes clicking against the cobbled stones.

Because logic is nonexistent in this universe, John followed the man he had met moments before into the dark, secluded alley. They continued for 3 minutes and 47 seconds when the man suddenly paused. The man spun 360 degrees counterclockwise, pressed his ear against a wall for 8 seconds, and turned to John.

“Do the same.”

“Why do I need to do that? Can you just tell me what’s in the briefcase so I can get back to-”

“Do the same.”

John complied and spun 360 degrees counterclockwise, pressed his ear against the same wall for 8 seconds, and turned to the man. Satisfied, the man clicked his heels 3 times and continued down the alley. After another 3 minutes and 47 seconds, the man suddenly paused again. The man spun 360 degrees clockwise this time, pressed his ear against the opposite wall for 8 seconds, and turned to John.

“Do the same.”

John complied and spun 360 degrees clockwise, pressed his ear against the same wall the man had just listened to for 8 seconds, and turned to the man. Satisfied, the man clapped his hands 3 times and continued down the alley. After another 3 minutes and 47 seconds, the man suddenly paused again. The man spun 360 degrees clockwise, 360 degrees counterclockwise, and then pressed his ear against both walls and the floor for 8 seconds each. He turned to John and said,

“Do the same.”

John spun 360 degrees clockwise, 360 degrees counterclockwise, and then pressed his ear against both walls and the floor for 8 seconds each. The man, satisfied, continued his journey down the street. They repeated the strange routine over and over again, every 3 minutes and 47 seconds, spinning and listening at seemingly random order. Finally, they arrived at the back of the alley.

John, excited, said, “We’re here! Can you show me what’s inside the briefcase now?”

The man replied, “Almost. Now we turn around and do it again.”

And so, they repeated the same process, going back the way they came, until they arrived back where they started. Finally, the man took a deep breath and led him into the black building. John stepped inside as well, and the door automatically closed shut behind them. John heard the lock click into place.

“Now, can you show me what’s inside the briefcase?” John said, seemingly unworried.

“Of course, but you must promise to never tell anyone what was inside,” the man whispered, suddenly quiet.

The man pulled back one clasp slowly. He pulled back the other. He took a key from the inside of his trench coat, inserted it into the lock on the briefcase, and turned the key. The lock clicked open. The briefcase slowly opened… but you’ll never find out what was inside because John kept his promise.